Breaking up. Speaking same language. 4 of 4.

DO YOU SPEAK THE SAME LANGUAGE?

Most of the time, no!  We all speak different languages.  What motivates me, you may be blind too.  What makes you upset may make someone else ecstatic!  Words, Time, Gifts, Acts, and Touch are the 5 predominate types of language that one speaks (explanations are listed below.)  The 5 languages of love is a great book (click here to see it at Amazon)

Words of Affirmation

Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important.

Quality Time

In the vernacular of Quality Time, nothing says, “I love you,” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby.

Receiving Gifts

Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you.

Acts of Service

Can vacuuming the floors really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most want to hear: “Let me do that for you.”

Physical Touch

This language isn’t all about the bedroom. A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, holding hands, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love.

It is beneficial for you to understand what language you speak AND what language your beloved speaks.  If you’re not speaking the same language, you’re not communicating, you are unable to compromise and there will be no commitment to continue together.

Chaplain Royal Bush and Chaplain Beth Loofe are Interfaith Chaplains offering nondenominational and nonreligious care and services to all, without exception in Nebraska and Iowa. They conduct Weddings, Premarital Coaching, Couples Coaching,Funerals, End of Life Planning, and Pastoral Care. For more information please email info@inclusivelife.org OR phone 402-575-7006. Omaha Weddings, Omaha Counseling, Omaha Funerals.