Showing posts with label Couples Coaching. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Couples Coaching. Show all posts

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Mom


Eric Fromm writes “Mother's love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved.”  I know that as I get older my mother seems to get smarter…  all her stories, beliefs and direction she gave me.  Probably the greatest gift she could ever pass to me was the gift of love.  Reach out to your mother today and those who play those roles for us.  Extend a word, a smile or a hug.

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s, Premarital  Couples Coaching, Funeral Minister, Pastoral Care.  (402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     Nebraska & Iowa

Monday, September 19, 2011

Body & Car


My body is much like my car.  If there is no fuel, it doesn’t move.  If it is not hydrated, it doesn’t move.  And if the life blood of the car is not kept filtered and fresh, it will stop moving.  I need food, water and my spiritual connection to what I hold to be true and sacred to keep my mind, body and spirit centered.

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Today


EMERGENCY MESSAGE FROM THIS BROADCAST STATION: There are not enough bridges in this world and in your life, and too many walls.  Now is the time to live, now is the time to engage, now is the time to get through those items for tomorrow.  You ARE beautiful, you ARE loved, and you ARE worthy!

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Change


All it takes is one of us to push that first domino to begin the chain reaction that leads to change…  It could be you holding a door for someone that has their hands full or simply saying good morning to someone or helping someone carry something.  All acts of kindness that may result in another person paying “it” forward.  We can be the change in the world we seek!

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Kindness


Why should I…help others, feed others or even vote.  I am only one person and the actions of one do not make a difference.  

Why vote in any election my votes does not matter.  In the United States you are allowed to vote, what a wonderful RESPONSIBILITY!  Your vote does matter, it is needed and you have a responsibility to make YOUR voice heard.  Know the issues, know the candidates and be an informed voter.  

You can feed a person for a day with one fish.  Teach them to fish and you can feed them and others for a lifetime!  You CAN make a difference by helping others with your time (teaching), your talents (sharing your passions) or your treasure (donations.)  Paying it forward does make a difference and what goes around DOES come around!  

Once YOU acknowledge that YOUR acts of kindness (both received and given by you) you then can no longer believe that what you do does not matter.  You can make a difference your life and the lives of others!   


We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Sunday, September 11, 2011

9/11 to me


Today is September, 11th.  It represents the ten year anniversary of what has lead to many changes in our country, and others.
I woke up that morning, it was my day off.  I was the Executive Housekeeper at the Embassy Suites.  I was talking to a dear friend of mine, Weenonah Bayer.  As we were talking we both happened to turn the news on and was confused.  We hung up trying to get a grip on it.  She has a son that lives near DC, so her focus was on that story.  Then the image that will forever be burned into my memory with little chance of being erased.  With smoke coming out of one of the towers, I watched as the big plane flew right into the other tower. After seeing it a couple of times, it still did not register to me what the hell was going on.  I called Nonah back and asked her.  When we both clued in, we both were hysterical for different reasons.
How did you react?  What did you do?  I wanted to go shoe shopping.  I could not find a store that was opened.  I threw a fit.  Yelling, using foul language, ready to fight someone, something…  I was mad as hell that someone did this to my country.  Even for that moment, New York was mine too!
The word I use today is numb.  I was numb then and I am numb now.  I don’t read books, I don’t watch movies and don’t like photos of that day.  I don’t know if it is too much for me to bare or as long as I don’t have to deal with it, I don’t have to deal with it.
That does mean I have not cried.  That does not mean I have not prayed.  And that does not mean that I have not given thought to those who lost their lives and who gave their lives that day (and the days following.)
I am not sure what our country has learned from this event.  I am saddened to read and listen to the words of others who condemn all Muslims for the events of that day.  I don’t understand how an entire group of people (in varying degrees of their faith) can be held accountable for the action of those who took actions that were not representing Muslims world-wide or ALL Muslims for that matter.
Andrea Raynor has been serving as a Ground Zero Chaplain since 9/11/01.  While working in the morgue for many weeks she received body bag after body bag.  She offered a blessing not knowing what religion the person had practiced.  One day, what was believed to be the remains of the hijackers were found, a worker helped here instead.  She asked “Was this body desecrated in any way when you found it?  Was it spat upon or treated in any disrespectful way?”  And what she was told brought her to tears.  The reply from the worker was “These remains were treated with the same respect as all the other remains.  After all, this is still someone’s son.”
Romans 12:5 tells us “…we are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other.”  Reading that story conjured up many emotions, thoughts and visions.  I keep thinking of MLK being shot, JFK being shot, Harvey Milk being shot, and so many others.  I think of the rage of hate that others have when they want to bring harm or demonstrate indifference towards other human beings.  No one is a second class citizen.  We are all from the same universe, when we will start treating each other as equals? 

Saturday, September 10, 2011

YES I DID


The wishbone is not a substitute for the backbone.  Coulda, woulda, and shoulda added together-equal nothing.  YOU are the author of your life story.  Not the media.  Not people or groups that say you are not worthy.  Not your past mistakes.  Turn the no you cant’s into YES I DID!

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Today


In every nation there is work to be done.  In every community there are wounds to heal. And in every person exists a heart of hearts to accomplish it all.  In the US we have people who can’t afford to pay their cable bill.  In other countries finding food to keep their children alive is a daily struggle.  In some countries finding clean water to drink is the struggle.  We can make a difference.  If we choose to.

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Ego's

This society has a great need for gratification, and the culture is says it's possible for everyone to satisfy all their needs and desires all the time which allows for one person at a time to get all of the blame via the clashes of ego’s. I long for a time when we focus on feeding our souls and not our ego’s; when it is easier to build someone up instead of tearing them down. Are you ready?

I’m 43 years old, soon (very soon) to be 44. That extra year may make a difference. I remember times growing up in Bellevue. I recall the interaction that everyone shared with each other. A level of respect, if you will, that I believe for the most part, is absent today.

It goes beyond listening skills, it goes beyond holding doors open, it goes beyond helping do all you can with what you have because it is the right thing to do. It goes beyond what and HOW we are taught as a society by ads, commercials, TV shows, movies, social media, and music. People seem to be mere commodities of disposable proportions, and you don’t have to be a gang member to behave like that.

It seems to me, that in my childhood, and I own that… MORE people realized that they lived in glass houses and so they didn’t throw stones themselves. Today there sure is a lot of finger pointing going on. This person does this, that person said that, this group does this, those people do this… Accepting personal responsibility for your own actions, your own life, your own truth, your own journey would go a long way in making this world a better place.

I can be the change that I seek in this world. If I point one finger at someone else, I will remember that there are three pointing back at me.

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis. Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship? US! We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception. Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.

(402) 575-7006 www.inclusivelife.org

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Focus


I observed some human interactions this weekend that made me sad; people treating others to the point of breaking them down to tears, some intentional and some perhaps not.  When we communicate we remember only  7% of spoken words, we recall 38% of the tone of voice used and the greatest impression is 55% of body language displayed!  Remember that words can hurt as much as sticks and stones!

It is a good thing to be focused.  And it is a bad thing to be so focused that you lose sight of what you are focused on and that everyone around becomes a blur.  I believe that part of the enlightenment is the experience of the lessons in the journey.  Allowing others to participate (and accepting that they will NOT do it the exact way you would AND may in fact achieve the desired results.  And then maybe they won’t.), helping others grow and learn helps us grow and learn as well.


We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Happy Sunday

Now that worship has ended let the service begin. What a great way to be mindful of one of the reasons to gather in community; to be reminded that the lessons we should be learning-we should be sharing (and not with just each other on Sunday!) Happy Sunday…

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Disposable Items


I have been typing, texting and leaving messages for some friends whom I have not spent time with for some time.  They had not responded to any of the communications AND I kept sending them.  I knew that they were being received and read.   I got an note from them confirming that.  Sometimes our friends and family are in different places in life than we are.  Don’t ever forget, give up or stop loving them.

Razors, plastic bags, diapers, cameras are all examples of disposable items.  People and relationships are not disposable, well, at least they should not be.  How many times has something happened between you and another person and either you or the other person “quit” the relationship?  Regardless if it is a neighbor, family, friends, co-worker, or… 

In the service industry there is a saying that “it takes years to win a customer and only seconds to lose one.”  Unfortunately we are a society that values temporary relationships (get what you need/want, quick gratification, and often place little or no value on long standing commitment, loyalty and value in building and growing with one another. 

Running or quitting will not solve the issue at hand.  It may relieve you have having to “deal” with it AND it will happen again with different people.  You must forge your way through the wall despite how difficult it is.  The reward will be greater than you can ever imagine. 


We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org     

Monday, August 22, 2011

I can


Edward Hale wrote “I am only one, but still I am one. I cannot do everything, but still I can do something; and because I cannot do everything, I will not refuse to do something I can do.”  This is so true for each of us; at work, at home, in relationships, in worship, in most every aspect of our lives.  It’s not about I think I can, it is about yes I will!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

A season of change


This summer I have learned that in me resides a raging spring that is ready to be unleashed.  I know that it takes each season to grow, learn, be, and prepare.  I am at peace with my piece of life.  I am grateful for the many blessings I have.  I love, the love that I know.    

The spring that is in me is a source of life, truth, love, enlightenment.  Perhaps not the source of life, truth, love and enlightenment for you, and it may include you.  I pray daily, I think moment my moment, I meditate, I remain still,and I exist all the while with family, friends and the needs and actions of the world on my mind.

Happy Sunday to you, Namaste!  

I offer the following words "I give thanks to God, the earth, the spirituality that connects each living being, our foremothers and forefathers, and the universe that allows us a place to live.  I pray, hope and make room for health, love and peace for us all.  I pray, hope and make room for each of us to share live, love, peace and our journey of enlightenment, in the many things that are good, true and love: AMEN"

Thursday, August 18, 2011

My Family


Annoying, caring, chaotic, heredity, important, laughter, love, Mom, unforgettable… words that remind me of family (given or chosen.)  

I have a small given family, I was raised in a single parent family, it was just mom and I.  My Sister passed away when I was 25, my brothers Royal (yes we share the same name) and Shawn are still alive.  I have a much bigger family now, because of in-laws.  I always wanted nieces and nephews, and I have them now!  There is nothing like a child calling you “Uncle Royal”  I LOVE IT!  (ok, it almost brings me to tears…)

Despite my life journey, the mistakes, trials and tribulations my family has never turned their back on me, never stopped loving me and never stopped being a fan.  And, as I have said before, as I get older, Mom gets smarter J

You can’t live without them, and I wouldn’t want to!
Chaplain Royal


We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org    

Inclusive Life is very proud to be a member of “All About Weddings”, a local organization focusing on bringing together premier local vendors that provide wedding services.  Inclusive Life is a member in good standing with American Association of Wedding Officiant’s.  We receive training from the International Association of Faith Based Counselors.  

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Celebration of Community


I volunteered with the American Red Cross Disaster Services. After several calls to service, I grew attracted to responding to small town disasters; the people from smaller towns were more open to serving, helping and doing whatever they could to help others (I think those pies tasted just a little bit better too…) I give thanks & celebrate those who serve others.  Thank you for you!

I also remember volunteering security with the Sheriffs Explorer Unit at the County Fair each year.  I always chose the VFW or American Legion food booth to eat.  Their hamburgers tasted better, and I always got a bigger piece of pie than the chain food booth down the walk.

This is all not to say that big city folks don’t know hospitality, because we do.   I worked in the hotel industry in Omaha for many years, home to Brookshire Hathaway Investors weekend, NCAA Mens College World Series, The 2nd largest Zoo in the US; Henry Doorly Zoo and of course Strat Comm (Formally Strategic Air Command) and we enjoy millions of visitors to our city each  year, commenting on how wonderful and warm our hospitality is.

I think the most wonderful comment about our city is when Jonathan moved to Omaha from the East coast.  And within 6 months of being here he witnessed a storm (it IS Nebraska!) and many trees feel all over the place.  What he observed was normal to me, everyone out in the street helping each other.  He said, “Oh my, you all help each other here?”  “Back east, most people would look out their door and then go back in.”  I like that it IS about people helping people, neighbor helping neighbor.  Human serving human.

In these days we seemed glued to our text messages, emails and time on the internet.  I wonder how do we get to know our neighbors, friends, how do we keep in touch with family.  How does that happen now? 

Perhaps it is serving up that bigger piece of pie and sharing…
Chaplain Royal


We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org    

Inclusive Life is very proud to be a member of “All About Weddings”, a local organization focusing on bringing together premier local vendors that provide wedding services.  Inclusive Life is a member in good standing with American Association of Wedding Officiant’s.  We receive training from the International Association of Faith Based Counselors. 

Monday, August 15, 2011

Are you the one?


Are you the one?

Are you the one who thinks that you are not worthy of that job?
Or are you the one who thinks that you are not smart?
Perhaps you’re the one who thinks that only bad things happen to you.

Are you the one who insists that there is no one special for you on earth?
Or are you the one who thinks that you are not good looking enough?
Perhaps you’re t he one who thinks that you are not beautiful.

Are you the one who insists that you have no friends?
Or are you the one who thinks that no one can ever be trusted?
Perhaps you’re the one who thinks that they are not loved.

Are you the one who insists that your health can’t get any better?
Or are you the one who thinks that no one cares why should you?
Perhaps you’re the one who thinks that you are not worthy.

Are you the one who is reading this and some of it sounds like you?
Or are you the one who is thinking that all of it sounds like you?
Perhaps you’re the one who needs to hear this message…

You are beautiful
You are loved
You are worthy

I hope you are the one who will take time to realize that you matter.  I pray that you make time to get to know you, and like you and love you.  If you don’t, how can you expect anyone else to do the same?  I will always have time to listen, care and help if you let me.  I hope you, in turn, will do the same for someone else when they are in need.  Love, not money, is what matters most in life.

Three life lessons for you to absorb; To the world, you may only be one person.  To one person, YOU may be THE world!  Those that matter, don’t mind.  Those that mind, don’t matter!  And, if you always do what you have always done you will always get what you always got.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

Saturday, something to think about


The Book of the Teacher reads “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven; A time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted; A time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance.”  In the 60’s Turn Turn Turn was a popular song.  The words today have just as much relevance.  Pause for a moment and think about what season you are living in now.

I have been told that there are four seasons to a man’s life…
1.      1.  The time that he believes in Santa
2.       2. The time that he no longer believes in Santa
3.       3. The time he wants to be Santa
4.       4. The time he looks like Santa

I do believe that at some point all of us try and “seek my face” (God) and in other words, try to find ourselves, our truth, more enlightenment.  There is a time that we are born that we have no control over and a time to die which, normally, we have no control over.  What we DO have control  over is the choices of what happens in between.  The time to plant love, relationships, help, culture, nurturing.  The time to laugh and live or the time to experience and weep.  These are all choices that we have free agency of, and depending where you are at in your life journey, your choices and outcomes will be very different.
I CAN BE THE CHANGE I SEEK IN THIS WORLD…  I will rejoice, I will do good while I live, I will see the fruits of my labor, and I will be grateful for the gifts I have been given.

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org    

Inclusive Life is very proud to be a member of “All About Weddings”, a local organization focusing on bringing together premier local vendors that provide wedding services.  Inclusive Life is a member in good standing with American Association of Wedding Officiant’s.  We receive training from the International Association of Faith Based Counselors. 

Friday, August 12, 2011

Friday Family


For many, family traditions counter alienation & confusion, they help define who we are; they provide something consistent in an ever changing world.  It is also said that family “life” can be bitter, operating with no rules so wounds take longer to heal, if at all.  I know families have their own characteristics.  I am most happy to with my families, given and chosen.  They all make me a better person.

As the story a young man had a mom only had one eye. He hated her… she was such an embarrassment. She cooked for students and teachers to support the family.  There was this one day during elementary school where mom came to say hello to him. He was so embarrassed.  How could she do this to him? He ignored her, threw her a hateful look and ran out. The next day at school one of his classmates said, ‘EEEE, your mom only has one eye!’

He wanted to bury myself. He also wanted his mom to just disappear. He confronted her that day and said, ‘ If you’re only gonna make me a laughing stock, why don’t you just die?’  Mom did not respond… he didn’t stop to think for a second about what he had said, because he was full of anger, oblivious to her feelings.
He wanted out of that house, and have nothing to do with her. So he studied real hard, got a chance to go abroad to study.  He then got married and bought a house.  He had kids and was happy with his life.  Then one day, his Mother came to visit.  She hadn’t seen him in years and had never meet her grandchildren or his wife.

When she stood by the door, my children laughed at her, and I yelled at her for coming over uninvited. He screamed at her, ‘How dare you come to my house and scare my children!’ GET OUT OF HERE! NOW!’  And to this, his mother quietly answered, ‘Oh, I’m so sorry. I may have gotten the wrong address,’ and she disappeared out of sight.  One day, a letter regarding a school reunion came to my house. So I lied to my wife that I was going on a business trip. After the reunion, I went to the old shack just out of curiosity.  My neighbors said that she died. I did not shed a single tear. They handed me a letter that she had wanted me to have.

“My dearest son,
I think of you all the time. I’m sorry that I came to your house and scared your children.  I was so glad when I heard you were coming for the reunion. But I may not be able to even get out of bed to see you. I’m sorry that I was a constant embarrassment to you when you were growing up.  You see……..when you were very little, you got into an accident, and lost your eye. As a mother, I couldn’t stand watching you having to grow up with one eye. So I gave you mine.  I was so proud of my son who was seeing a whole new world for me, in my place, with that eye.
With all my love to you,
Your mother.”

I understand that not every single person enjoys a supportive, healthy, loving, nurturing, positive relationship with members of their family, and sometimes some have struggle, so hard, to maintain any type of relationship and/or contact.  The message I share today is that you can choose to accept you family as they are or not.  Some people have created a “chosen family”, which for some has replaced their given family or is in addition to their given family.  Whatever your choice, be at peace with it, embrace it and give yourself permission to live and get on with your life.


We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org    

Inclusive Life is very proud to be a member of “All About Weddings”, a local organization focusing on bringing together premier local vendors that provide wedding services.  Inclusive Life is a member in good standing with American Association of Wedding Officiant’s.  We receive training from the International Association of Faith Based Counselors. 

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Tibetan Thursdays


It has been said that until we achieve inner peace, peace in the outer world is not possible.  This quote, in my belief, goes hand in hand with that great Jimi Hendrix quote “When the power of love overcomes the love of power the world will know peace.”

Some people have very high standards for themselves and others.  So high that neither may be reached, which often causes many relationship and personal health issues.  Some people set no standards or goals and wonder in life without focus or knowing purpose or passion.  And yet others are at peace with themselves, life and others. 

Think of where you have been, where you are at if there are any changes you need to make.  You can be the change you seek in this world.

We know that up to 70% of the population in America does not attend worship on a regular basis.  Who can individuals, couples and families turn to when they need care & services traditionally found by a place of worship?  US!  We are Inclusive Life, and we serve all without exception.  Wedding Officiant’s-Premarital & Couples Coaching-Funeral Ministers-Pastoral Care.
(402) 575-7006     www.inclusivelife.org    

Inclusive Life is very proud to be a member of “All About Weddings”, a local organization focusing on bringing together premier local vendors that provide wedding services.  Inclusive Life is a member in good standing with American Association of Wedding Officiant’s.  We receive training from the International Association of Faith Based Counselors.