Judgment

Wikipedia reports that the word judgment has roughly 4 types of meanings;

Informal-These are opinions that are expressed as facts.

Informal and psychological–These are used in reference to the quality of cognitive faculties and adjudication capabilities of particular individuals, typically called wisdom or discernment.

Legal–These are used in the context of legal trials, to refer to a final finding, statement, or ruling, based on a considered weighing of evidence, called "adjudication".

And religious–Used in the concept of salvation to refer to the adjudication of God in determining Heaven or Hell for each and all human beings.

Judgment is one of those words that can be a hot potato when in a group of mixed company.  Most people will say that they don’t judge.  A few will admit they do.  I believe that judgment causes more broken hearts, hurt feelings and diminished life than diseases cause.

Some people think before they speak and choose carefully what they say and to whom they say it to.  Most have a tiny gap between the moment they think and the moment they speak, with little regard to the; who, what, where, when and why they are speaking.

As humans we often fail to realize, remember or embrace the fact that judgment does not only take the form of criticism, approval is also a form of judgment. When we approve of people we are sitting in judgment of them the same as when we criticize them.

Sure, positive, constructive judgment hurts less than sharp, focused and often harming criticism, but it all hurts nonetheless. 

How do we fix this?  I am not sure we do.  I think it is human nature to judge, to criticize and to seek approval from those who impact our lives (one way or another.)  I share that I think that time does heal most things.  A blessing of growing older is that we gain wisdom. 

Wisdom teaches many things to many people.  I know that some “judgments” others placed on me and some “criticisms” where founded, and yet others were from people who were not in a good place in their own live and their words perhaps provided an outlet for their fears, frustrations and failures.  And I know that sometimes we are allowed the “gift” of cross paths with others who share words with us at the time we need them.  It may not make sense in that moment, but at some point it may be revealed.  It may not be about us, it may be about them, or someone we know together.  It is a small word, this I know.

In closing I invite all of us to remember that all words can be healing, destructive, powerful and mean different things to different people at different times in various places in their life.

We can be the change we seek in this world, and in ourselves.  One day.  One journey.  One person.  One word at a time.

Royal D. Bush serves as Interfaith Chaplain.  He has studied at Andersonville Theological Seminary, and the International Institute of Faith Based Counseling.  He also holds a Bachelor Degree in business administration. He is available for premarital coaching, couples coaching, life coaching, and pastoral care in the Nebraska and Iowa area.

Inclusive Life offers both nondenominational and nonreligious care-serving all, without exception!  Inclusive Life offers Wedding Ministers, Premarital Coaching, Couples Coaching, Funeral Ministers, End of Life Planning, and Pastoral Care.

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