The most important things

There is a saying, everything happens for a reason.  Many subscribe that the Sacred has everything planned out, to the detail.  I subscribe that maybe the big stuff through life may happen that way, but most of the other stuff happens due to our own free will, our free agency, and our own choices.

Many more people could have died in the 9/11 disaster in New York City.  Many were late or didn’t go into work that day for many different reasons.  Some had car problems, some had a child who spilled something on their outfit, some alarm clocks didn’t go off, and one even was late because he forgot that it was his turn to by donuts that day.

In my life, I have come to know that we mostly arrive where we are supposed to be when we are to be there.  We may not know why or how, probably which isn’t important anyway.  As I look back on  my life there have been times that I did not want to be where I was, with whom I was with, and sometimes even how I got there was unnerving.  Nonetheless, as it turns out, I was where I was to be.

In our lives, today, we too often take time to do the routine things that make life easier, and often push away the coulda, woulda, shoulda moments that make life worth living.  You know like taking time to check up on FaceBook, emails and text messages instead of making a phone call or visit a loved one.  Catching up on our favorite recorded TV programs instead of checking on a neighbor or spending a couple of hours volunteering.  Or perhaps going out to dinner instead of working through a recipe with your partner, loved one, family member, friend or someone who needs you.

A believe this story sums it up best.  As I recall; the nurse took the tired, anxious serviceman to the bedside.  “Your son is here,” she said to the old man. She had to repeat the words several times before the patient’s eyes opened.  Heavily sedated because of the pain of his heart attack, he dimly saw the young uniformed Marine standing outside the oxygen tent. He reached out his hand. The Marine wrapped his toughened fingers around the old man’s limp ones, squeezing a message of love and encouragement.

The nurse brought a chair so that the Marine could sit beside the bed. All through the night the young Marine sat there in the poorly lighted ward, holding the old man’s hand and offering him words of love and strength.  Now and then she heard him say a few gentle words. The dying man said nothing, only held tightly to his son all through the night.

Along towards dawn, the old man died. The Marine released the now lifeless hand he had been holding and went to tell the nurse. While she did what she had to do, he waited.  Finally, she returned. She started to offer words of sympathy, but the Marine interrupted her.  “Who was that man?” he asked.

The nurse was startled, “He was your father,” she answered.  “No, he wasn’t,” the Marine replied.“I never saw him before in my life.”  “Then why didn’t you say something when I took you to him?” “I knew right away there had been a mistake, but I also knew he needed his son, and his son just wasn’t here. When I realized that he was too sick to tell whether or not I was his son, knowing how much he needed me, I stayed.”

We can be the change we seek in this world.  One day, one person, one moment, one journey and one coulda, woulda, shoulda moment at a time.

Chaplain Royal Bush and Chaplain Beth Loofe are Interfaith Chaplains offering nondenominational and nonreligious care and services to all, without exception in Nebraska and Iowa. They conduct Weddings, Premarital Coaching, Couples Coaching,Funerals, End of Life Planning, and Pastoral Care. For more information please email info@inclusivelife.org OR phone 402-575-7006. Omaha Weddings, Omaha Counseling, Omaha Funerals.

Comfort Zone

Joan River said “The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it”, isn’t that how, many times, we approach life?  If it is in our comfort zone, I will consider it.  If it is familiar, I’ll try it.  If others I know are doing it, I might. 

We grow the most and are often the most powerful when we are learning and when we are out of our comfort zone.

I took a class a couple of years ago.  It was an 18 week class that met once a week for 3 hours, or so.  At first I was intimidated by the others in the group as they had more experience and education that I did with regard to the topic at hand creating life that matters, self awareness, self reflection and self assurance.  It was a faith based class.  What I realized is that so many in the class had so much hurt and pain caused by main stream organized religion.  I was the only one in the class that did not, and that is why I thought I didn’t fit.  I quickly realized how that fit with the others.

Sharing life experiences, some most very personal and private, in open, in class for all to hear… wow!  I found it to be powerful, rewarding, refreshing and most insightful.  I would not have been able to accomplish many self reflections if it was not for feeling safe AND going out of my comfort zone at the same time.  When I saw that others were “smiling” I realized that I could jog right along with them.  I came to the edge, I jumped, I flew and I realized how beautiful the tapestry of life, spirituality and the sacred is.

I can be the change that I seek in this world.  One day, one journey, one person, one word, or day of jogging at a time.  Peace, Love and Health for us all!

Chaplain Royal Bush and Chaplain Beth Loofe are Interfaith Chaplains offering nondenominational and nonreligious care and services to all, without exception in Nebraska and Iowa. They conduct Weddings, Premarital Coaching, Couples Coaching, Funerals, End of Life Planning, and Pastoral Care. For more information please email info@inclusivelife.org OR phone 402-575-7006. Omaha Weddings, Omaha Counseling, Omaha Funerals.

Words

“One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you can't utter” says James Earl Jones.  I recall some of those times and remember that I was scared, upset, grief stricken, mad as hell, hurt, and yes in love and feeling good!  I remember singing these words in Church… “Be still and know that God is God.”  Be still and now that silence can be as powerful as the biggest word.

“One of the hardest things in life is having words in your heart that you can't utter”, those words spoken by James Earl Jones.  Perhaps it is words of thanks, love or apology.  Perhaps they are words of regret, sorrow or friendship.

Whatever the words, sometimes they are written on our hearts so large (like size 100 font, bold, underlined and blinking!)  But in that snap moment the very line between our heart, our mind and our mouths snaps and is just not connected.  You know, kind of like Arthur Fonzarelli trying to get the word “Sorry” out… (If I dated myself, sorry!) aaaaaaaey!

I recall some of those moments for me and I remember that I was scared, upset, grief stricken, mad as hell, hurt, and yes in love and feeling good! 

I talked earlier this week about words, the ones we choose to use.  Perhaps sometimes words choose us.  In these moments when the words just refuse to leave my mouth I know my body language and eyes have said much, but the without that very word I wanted to, needed to, just had to share maybe the moment was more beautiful without it.  Sometimes less is more, sometimes it is what was NOT said that IS really the most important.

I remember singing these words in Church… “Be still and know that God is God.  Be Still and Know that God is God.  Be still and know that God is God.”  That will resonate with many of my friends, not all.  For me it speaks loudly on my connection with the Sacred and my life journey. 

I can be the change that I seek in this world.  One day, one journey, one person, one word  or ONE piece of silence at a time.  Peace, Love and Health for us all!  Happy Sunday!

Chaplain Royal Bush and Chaplain Beth Loofe are Interfaith Chaplains offering nondenominational and nonreligious care and services to all, without exception in Nebraska and Iowa. They conduct Weddings, Premarital Coaching, Couples Coaching,Funerals, End of Life Planning, and Pastoral Care. For more information please email info@inclusivelife.org OR phone 402-575-7006. Omaha Weddings, Omaha Counseling, Omaha Funerals.

Perception

I was told that perception is everything.  Perception can be interpreted many ways; if it is something that “we” perceive or if it is something that we do or say (or perhaps not do or not say) that is perceived by others, not the way we intended it!

A study was done in which people on opposite sides of an issue where given the same newspaper article to read.  The people were asked to read the article carefully and to offer their reaction.  On average, people said that they thought the article was biased…AGAINST their own position.  That is, people on BOTH sides of the issue thought the exact same article was biased against their side.  The article could not possibly have been biased against both sides of the issue.  Obviously, it wasn’t the content of the article that drove the reaction, but the perspective of the readers. 

Doesn’t our daily life have the same effect?  Work, family, relationship, going out to dinner, friends, the list is endless of times that perception played a key in how we communicate (positively or negatively.)  I have shared before that the actual words we use are remembered less than our body language and tone of voice.  And since most of our communication is done via email and text messages that may also add to the confusion and someone’s ability to perceive a communication in a different manner than it was intended for.

So how do we “fix” this?  Simple.  Get rid of computers, phones and email.  (ok and since that is not likely to happen)  perhaps it is not something that we get rid of or fix as much as it is something that we all need to be aware of and do our very best to improve upon.  Be intentional about how and when and why we communicate.  Sometimes silence is golden!

I can be the change that I seek in this world, one day, one journey, one person one form of communication at a time…

Chaplain Royal Bush and Chaplain Beth Loofe are Interfaith Chaplains offering nondenominational and nonreligious care and services to all, without exception in Nebraska and Iowa. They conduct Weddings, Premarital Coaching, Couples Coaching,Funerals, End of Life Planning, and Pastoral Care. For more information please email info@inclusivelife.org OR phone 402-575-7006. Omaha Weddings, Omaha Counseling, Omaha Funerals.